sepia dia de lost muertos

sepia dia de lost muertos
Originally uploaded by GButterfly.

Today's dia de los muertos photo. Since I couldn' t get out to find one I made one.

ghost in the window

ghost in the window
Originally uploaded by GButterfly.

Don't you hate it when...

...you dress up all fancy - when you leave the house you think you look oh so fine -then you get out and about and happen to pass a mirror or a window and realize you look really old. This poor gal she's having just that kind of day - though by the big grin she doesn't seem to be that bothered by it.

Dia do Los Muertos challenge.....I was so excited to find this and other day of the dead displays at the market yesterday. Well -it reminded me just how much I am facinated by Dia de Los Muertos. so...I am declaring this the Lunes De Los Muertos! That means I am challenging myself to come up with one day of the dead image to represent every day of the month of october. I'm allowing wiggle room here - for example today I'm sick so I didn't get out and photograph any -well lucky for me yesteday I got a few images - so one of them can count for today - Wednesday...I'll be at work 12 hours so again I can substitute an image from another day. I have a feeling it will be a challenge this first half of the month -but later in the month it should get easier. Now I'm not talking just run of the mill haloween displays - these images have to have something to do with Day of the Dead celebrations.

Anyone care to join me in the search?

literal butterfly bush - migration of the monarchs friday

I'm not 100% happy with how the photo showed in this blog . Well, go to the original flickr page to see it full size - it was really amazing to see so many butterflies all in one place - on one bush.

Friday - my day off I was sick so I couldn't visit my grandparents or borrow my nieghbor Katie as I 'd planned. I did however get to see this fabulous collection of butterflies as the monarchs migrated through. for this I am grateful. There were other photographic gems but I'm not sure yet if I will post them here. I'm thinking about putting together a show. That seems a little egotistical - but hubby thinks I have enough. I am also grateful this weekend for: my hubby, getting together w/ Paula & Enrique to hear Brazilian music, and still so grateful for having found a church which we are still getting to know.

bug on pink

bug on pink
Originally uploaded by GButterfly.

I had a rough weekend I was sick with allergies & a cold - so no recent photos - but I finally did uplaod these. A week or so ago hubby brought home this lovely orange creature. Some gals like flowers - but he knows the way to my heart is colorful winged creatures. I'm not sure what this guy is but he is pretty and very fuzzy. After a few photots i let him loose in the butterfly garden - I hope he's happy there.

I'm feeling a bit sorry for myself (ok understatement) becuase we're still not preganant but it seems everyone else at work is - there are 3 showers planned before december - one of them for tomorrow. grrrr.

I have more to chatter later but I need to give my back a break from the computer since I still have to work from 530/6 until 9 tonight.

Praying for Us! -- 7437

Praying for Us! -- 7437
Originally uploaded by Zamboni.

found thi sphoto in the flickr stream of "zamboni" I was searching the term prayer for a good prayer image to inspire my fertility ATC. what better image could this be? I will try to draw the shadows of his face - so beautifyl. a baby is my prayer too.

rights reserved very blue moon over boats DSC_0152 copy

rights reserved very blue moon over boats DSC_0152 copy
Originally uploaded by GButterfly.

since my light meter was broken - i took this opportunity to play with some of my photos a bit.

the headless bride steps outside ...

the headless bride steps outside ...
Originally uploaded by GButterfly.

There haven't been any butterflies in my garden for some time other than the white cabbage butterflies - so the next best thing is a headless bride.
I'm feeling a bit like the headless bride lately - only not nearly so slim. I feel sometimes of late that my head of empty of everything but wanting - wanting for my womb to be full with child. will it happen? that's still to be determined God and modern medicine.

Let me also mention that I am mad at Costco for once again messing up my prints. I only did it becuase i can get same day service by uploading the prints straight to their website. I'm having trouble with the CD drive on my computer - it doesn't want to recognize my blank cds. so I had to upload. Anyhow they did a horrible job of cropping there were flecks on some of the photos (and no they were not on the original). I won't be using them again - even though they are cheap - I will just have to plan ahead better.

I know there was something else...but I'm in a benadryl fog. I have to go matte my photos so tomorrow i may cook

blue wings only

blue wings only
Originally uploaded by GButterfly.

I am so jealous of the people who have blue butterflies in thier area. none here - had to adjust the color on an orange pretty.
spent much of the day weeding the garden today. very sniffy itchy work for an allergy sufferer such as I. Still, it paid off -I got a few shots of this buttefly (seen in his natural orange on my flickr stream). Sweetie and I talked about art - he things I'm better than I think I am. Well, I seldom think I'm good at anything even if others think so.
Today though sniffly and tired - was still a good day becuase of the butterfly. Went to a nice dinner last night w/ some people from church. We were pleasantly surprised to find others who were as liberal as we are.
I don't want to jinx anything - so I'm trying not to talk so much about the fertility stuff it's difficulty -babies and toddlers everywhere I look. The toddler next door - she is one of my favorite toddlers ever. That reminds me - I need to ask her mum if I can pose her in my garden in fairy wings. She has fairy wings. Thats just one of the things I really like about her - that she likes to run around the yard wearing wings. Hubby is grilling - I'm being lazy after above mentioned allergy attack. Really I've been quite sleepy today - but we did stay pu a bit late. Tonight -to bed on time and plenty of vitamins so I start the week our rights.

first butterflies 2006023 yellow swallowtail tuesday

first butterflies 2006023 yellow swallowtail tuesday
Originally uploaded by GButterfly.

horray for the butterflies. I've been waiting for them. I waited all through spring. as summers starts I've watched the flowers start to bloom awaiting thier winged friends. a few cabage butterflies have been aroudn the garden over the last week - but this is the first day for these. How fortunate that this was my split shift so that I was home in the afternoon to see the.

hubby built me a new garden box

hubby built me a new garden box
Originally uploaded by GButterfly.

sometimes he builds me things to let me know he loves me. I really needed this this week. Planting flowers just seemed like the right thing to do.

orange cluster

orange cluster
Originally uploaded by GButterfly.

feeling somewhat more possitive today....there are options just maybe not the ones I'd planned......

sad little cherub waiting

sad little cherub waiting
Originally uploaded by GButterfly.

I am sad today - I thought this little guy was a proper image for the day. I got very sad news. I am in shock and sad. I don't understand why my life is going in this direction. That's all for now - I need to process and the blog is not the place for it.

some of my current favorites

some of my current favorites
Originally uploaded by GButterfly.

one lst thing...now I'll go to bed. I'll have to really spend timeand be more selective to make mosaic with a theme next time....

clematis suspended

clematis suspended
Originally uploaded by GButterfly.

I haven't writen much here - i knew I wouldn't be a regular blogger...
the sermon sunday got me thinking maybe I should be working with children again...more about that later. If I start writing about that now I'll be up all night. It's complex - it's all tied up with my fertility -and the reasons I stopped working in the not for proffit world/ with children. I've only recently really started back to exploring my spritual life - so it seems really too soon to start making decisions based on my feeligns after one sermon. I think Ariel is right - I need to see what kinds of things open up - I still think writing my family history is important - and learning more about qualitative research and semi-structured interviews. As I write this I realise ...if anyone else is reading this they probably don't know WHAT I am going on about - that and I wasn't plannig to stay up late writing tonight.
I've been obsessing about flickr - so I've been taking a lot of pictures. I think I need to go through maybe next weekend and delete the photos from my stream that aren't as good - or are the same.
It is still a mystery to me how people get so many comments or visitors to their pages. Is it the title? the time of day posted? they submit to groups? I'm not sure. what I really want is to kow if some of my photos are good enough to sell - but I've become obsessed with wanting a photo on the explore page becuase of the exposure it gets.
I need to learn more about what groups will provide the feedback I want - and forget about the explore page.

I really should go to bed - maybe I can take some photos tomorrow morning - I haven't taken a single photo today. I'm obsessed you know - I actually took photos in church - it didn't take away really from my hearing the message - of course - the photos weren't particularly good - they were lopsided.

yesterday morning...

red with yellow blur by home depot
Originally uploaded by GButterfly.

yesterday morning i went out with the intention of photographing tulips. I was only able to find red and yellow this year - and now near the size displays that I have seen in previous years.
The weather though couldn't have been more perfect. I may add more later in the week but for now I have to go to work. It's one of my longer days - 10 hours - but I don't dread this as much - I think my cold is breaking. I do hope I find opportunity to take a break in my work and get outside for my "lunch" break. (when you work 11-9 it's odd - its not really lunchtime when you take your break.) I wasn't able to get very many decent photos yesterday. I've been on a roll lately wanting to take photos of everything - a confluence of influences I think have led to this - joining flickr, warmer weather, wanting to try out my camera, oh and the obsessive side of me. That part somewhat relates to flickr. Now that I have seen what wonderful photos other people take - I'm detremined to improve my own photograpic skills. It's challenging being in kansas rather than near something breathtaking like mountains or the sea- but possibly that is why i have developed an interest in different perspectives, abstract images, and macros. I soooo want an extension ring - and a really good macro. oh - and I've also been fantasizing about an ubgrade in the digital point and shoot becuase you cann't alwasy carry the slr. My latest dreams: casio exilim s-100 (has split screen abiliy -and its TINY) and - this may be a greater desire....I want the canon powershot sd-550 its (drumrole please....) 7.1 megapixil, it's small and its got some neat color settings that I'm hungering to play with...but until i've saved some money or the price is dropped.....I'll have to wait. so, in the interiim I've placated myself by getting some film for my holga - i haven't done anything with film since december - and I'm hungering to do multiple exposures. gotta run!

tree in fog

tree in fog
Originally uploaded by marymuses.

This is such a great shot - taken by someone else.
I have so far to go with my photography.... I get bummed that none of my photos are chosen on flickr for interestingness or favorites & such - but then when I look at what everyone else is doing.... I realize I need more practice and a micro macro with an extension tube wouldn't hurt either

My head is still screaming with this cold/ headache/ hurt. I've eaten so much ibuprophen this week.

Photos With Wings

Well, if updating regularly is a sign of a good blog I'm terrible. I go in spurts. Won't have time to write anything this week unless I do Tuesday morning - and really I should work in the yard some more then and maybe go into work a few hours early or go visit my grandpa and start my oral history. I still need to work some more on question development though. I'm just putting this post here as a reminde that I need to write more consitenly.
Also- to remind me to talk about the thory of the soul which I developed today. Teaser: it shares some similarities to hindu thought and it also attempts to explain why there seem to be so many soulless sociopaths in society today.
on that cheerful thought I'll check on my flikr photos and go make dinner

City Market

strawberry guy
Originally uploaded by GButterfly.

I love the city market. good cheap vegetables, differnt people, and the strawberry guy. We call him the strawberry guy becuase the first time we went to the market he was calling out "strawberry strawberry strawberry" letting everyone know he had beautiful strawberries & he was ready to deal. I alwasy buy something from him due to his old world charm. He alsways says gratsi senora.

I've recently joined flicker - its becomming an addiction. Well, there is a group on there discussing what makes a good blog. I hadn't really thought about it but my blog isn't very good. It's all over the place. I don't really feel smart enough to share my political opions and I don't do enough knitting or other such creative pursuits to dedicate a blog just to one thing ... besides its representative of me and I am interested in many things - photography really is the thing that intersts me most right now.

So, here is one person from flicker's idea of what makes a good blog:
(Raphie Frank says:) "The question between what makes a good blog and what is necessary to grow a blog audience are two very different issues....A GOOD BLOG (in my opinion) involves some or all of the below variables, although different topics perhaps make some of the variables irrelevant.....1) Timeliness.......4) Actionable, useful information 5) Consistency of tone, look and feel........9) Frequent updates...And GOOD WRITING? You know it when you read it. Bad is bad and good is good...."

So there you have it. I don't really consider myself a good writer anymore. I did once, but I'm out of practice, and I've read more - so with more to compare I've fallen in rank in my own mind.

One poster suggested that many people read blogs and don't comment - something I'd never really considered - I don't imagine that many people read my blog - but just out of curiosity - if you read please post a comment - anything even just a hello. I'm just curious who does stumble accross it.
~G

buddah belly and other ramblings

I was looking for maternity tops I'm not pregnant, just fat and hoping to be pregnant soon. Actually trying to be pregnant soon - unless of course hubby decides to go to Africa. He has always wanted to go on a trip - then he gets romantic notions after we watch movies about all of the suffering in Africa. (invisible children http://www.invisiblechildren.com/home.php was the first, then the constant gardner.) I get those notions too - I want to help those children - with imunizations, with schools, but mostlly by spiriting them a way to a safer home and taking care of them. I can't of course: they have parents, families to which they belong. that is their life and it would be unfair to take just the children. It would be unfair even to take a whole family away from the village - its their home that they know -thier community -their society and you can only leave that really by choice. Besides, I'm not rich. Anyhow, if he runs off to aArica & gets himself shot by the Jonaeweed or more likely by some corrupt american or british company with financial interests in the region - that would put a major crimp in the whole raising a family thing. I know thats selfish; helping others is a greater good - but I want my own children. I used to help others then I reached a point where I was helping drug addicts and I had this growing feeling that it was unfair. They got to have children and I helped them, helped their children, but I didn't get to have children -becuase I was sacrificing my time and not making very much money (to afford a family) so that I could help them. I guess I just reached the age where my idealism drained right out of my heart. Wes still has some idealism. I'm torn. I'm afraid that if I sacraficed, gave up my desire for others again, I would grow to resent it and stop doing a good job. It's happened before - I give it my all then I feel the unfairness and I start to loose my steam. I do know that right now it is hard to imagine a fulfilling life if I cann't have my own children, and time is running out, it may have already run out - I'll find out more later this week when my lab results come back. Friday I had tubes and tubes of blood drawn. It really wiped me out - but it will be all worth it if I can have children

What go this ramble all started? Fasion. Yes to let me be really superficial for a moment: yes, so my belly is fat, my torso is long (actually it's my rise but whatever the point is) my fat belly is often not covered by the combination of today's too short tops and too low waisted bottoms. I just want to be comfortable and covered - and to have something flattering too - I don't necessarily want to wear fat clothes even though I am technically speaking fat. I totter between wearing normal clothes and fat womens clothes. so...I discovered a maternity shop called buddah belly so I typed that in to google and ran across this blog: buddah belly I like the way she writes - so I wanted to be able to go back to it and read some more. I'm using this post to bookmark it - and now I need to find the store buddah belly too - they have a nice wrap top that looks comforting and covering - yet is still pretty. and it's only $30 - which is more than I usually pay (I shop at thrift shops and target mostly - sometimes old navy or kohls sales racks) - but well worth it if I could wear it now to cover the belly and when preggers to cover the belly. Here it is: http://www.buddhabellymaternity.com/Brooklyn%20Top%20White.htm Of course I ran across a wonderful wrap top by some brittish place ( http://www.isabellaoliver.com/IOSite/prod/Tops/TP05.htm ) but the cost is $85 so I won't be buying that unless it goes down - maybe I'll find a knock off I really liked it - or I could learn to sew like I've been intending all of this time.

Well, if a blog is an glimpse into a person - this is a blog. If its supposed to be something more than that - then i've failed.

sky above QT

sky above QT
Originally uploaded by GButterfly.

last week I was filling up and had to take a shot because the sky was so pretty for a supposed winter day. This week I've had a few day off...snow and little sun.
I'm experimenting with flickr just becuase I have admired the photos others have posted there lately.